We all want our hearts to soar for someone or something. Many of us date because we’re trying to fill those needs in love.
The romance and mystery of marriage seems to hold the highest earthly peaks of pleasure and friendship. We want to contribute something significant to a meaningful cause. If you asked us, we might say we’re “pursuing marriage,” but a lot of us aren’t even close to marriage — in age, finances, maturity, education, stage of life.
Life is never only, or even mainly, about love and marriage.
Our life is about Jesus now — his love for us and his plans for us — whether we’re single or married, sixteen or sixty.
You may be dreaming about marriage already (I was), but is it realistic that the two of you could marry anytime soon? My advice — take it or leave it — is wait until you can reasonably marry him or her in the next eighteen months. The important part is that you , if God made it clear this was his will and his timing for you.
You won’t find eighteen months anywhere in the Bible, and so you should not treat it as God’s law.
Understanding the distinctions between the relationships will protect us from all kinds of pain and failure in dating. Romantic intimacy is safest in the context of marriage, and marriage is safest in the context of clarity.For many of us, we just want to be happy, to belong, to be valued.We imagine our deepest needs being met in the intimacy of being with a special young man or woman.He casts romance as a qualification for the good life, and projects anything else as empty, lonely, and purposeless by comparison.He capitalizes on our desires and convinces us we must “love” in order to truly live, that all the highest pleasures and fullest experiences are found in a relationship with a boyfriend or girlfriend (or husband or wife).